Hunter continues...............

I’ve numbered all of my blogs – this is # 73 - not all have been posted – but most. It’s been a long 4 + months ……….

But tonight – remember those ice cream things with the swirly chocolate? Probably from the Good Humor truck………

That’s my brain tonight.  A swirl of  thoughts and emotions. As I’m on the floor with Hunter, he looks at me and says; “your eyes are all shiny and wet - what’s up, Human?”

“I’m just sad, Hunter…sometimes it’s just too much…”

“but we had a good day today, didn’t we?”

“well, yes we did.”

“at least it was for me – I played in the backyard while you DID WORK. I barked at squirrels all day, we took a walk, I got a treat (or two!), a couple of great meals, snuggles on the bed while you took a nap.  You even took me for a ride IN THE CAR!  You started a PROJECT that I can’t help with (except to lay at your feet and get in the way). It doesn’t get better than that!!”

“Well, that’s good for you, Hunter, but I still miss My Human – and I still miss Vespa too….and I know there is nothing I can do about it…it’s just the way things are now...”

“I know, but we had a GOOD DAY…”

“You’re right, as usual Hunter. We did. But I still get very sad…”

And then as I was sitting at the kitchen island after the dishes were done, I noticed, not for the first time, this:

We had stopped with the traditional gifts giving long ago – neither one of us really needed anything.  However……fun stuff was……..well, fun.   This was an Easter gift – a  Lamb Pen.  And it writes really well!

A toaster cover for Valentine’s Day ! Yes, really………..

Silly… yes…but. It meant we were each thinking about the other. Which we did – always. It was always about the other – even when we didn’t really feel like it.

And of course, there were THOSE moments…. We all have them. But now I miss even those………..

Oh – to have a real heart felt argument!  Or a debate about the next vacation………….or even the smallest decision, like what to cook for dinner, or watch on TV.       

I miss all of that.

And then some.

So what to do?  Pffffffbrttt – I don’t know.  Suck it up, buttercup?  No, that’s not the answer. ‘Why?’ you might ask?  Because it doesn’t work… Even raking the leaves today reminded me that we used to do this together…….I’d rake – he’d burn. Or whatever…….

Can you work together by yourself?  No, stupid, you cannot.

“But Human, we still have me?”

“Yes, Hunter, I do.  And I am grateful.  Really I am. You keep me grounded, keep me in the moment, keep me in the here and now... and I am grateful… however, I still miss MY human - Glenn. And I know I always will…………

And my eyes are shiny and wet…………….but, yes, we did have  a good day, Hunter and Me.