shadows

shadows. we know one when we see it.  we often play with them.  finger puppets against the wall. the lamp bright behind us. the flashlight under our chin. shadows on our faces. fun to do at a campfire on a warm night.

the sun at daybreak or nightbreak

long shadows cast as the sun rises or sets.

depending on where one is standing.

 it's fun to play with our shadows as we move around letting the sun shine behind us. 

our image temporarily outlined and colored in on the ground. the grey of that place where there is no light.

images of trees. leaves not yet fully in bloom.

patterns against the house or lawn or driveway.

is this god at play?

shadows everywhere.

that place where there is no light.

grief, sorrow, sadness, mourning. or maybe fear, desperation, anger. emotions run amok.

no light of the metaphorical kind. or any kind, actually.

 when our lives are 'good' (however you define that) there are no shadows. no lack of light.

when our lives are 'not good' (however you define that) there is an abundance of shadow.  lack of light.

death, we christian lutherans are taught, has no sting. jesus did that for us, took the sting upon himself, took it away from us.

we are not to fear the shadow of death. right. tell that to the grieving spouse, child, niece, nephew, parent, brother sister, friend.

the shadow of death stings. o baby does it ever.

the shadow hangs over me like a cloud fallen upon the earth. still. and probably forever.

there are moments, for sure, when the shadow lifts.  and resettles again. without invitation. all on its own.

but yet.  the ever-present shadow.  in spite of flutterings of joy now and again. in spite of the flutterings of hope.  in spite of ................

shadows prevail. and there is no peace.

the news that an extended family member is actively dying.

way too soon. as i'm sure his children will attest.

they will be orphans soon.

so do the shadows prevail?

 it seems like they do.

and yet. i try to believe that hope prevails.

that love prevails.

that life prevails.

that i will prevail.

 and so will his children.

but sometimes the shadows have the last word. at least for the moment.

And god?  in both the shadows and in the light.  I have to believe this.