from knotevenafter.com

A tattered psyche…  that phrase came to me as I was thinking about my visit with a therapist  - yes you heard me right…(isn’t stream of consciousness great??)

I’m not in ‘crisis’ mode, but I am tattered, in shreds, in disarray, torn apart, tattered like an old teddy bear from too much snuggling, that over worn pair of shoes, that favorite t-shirt too flimsy to wash anymore.  Pick your analogy...…

Tattered… but maybe not beyond repair…

And talking with an objective listener - someone who can shine that flashlight into that part of my soul that even I can’t see... and maybe help reweave the threads of my life – or at least that’s the optimal outcome.

But really – can anyone do this for another?  I wonder if maybe it is too much to ask…? Or at the least – too much to expect from another human being?

I did feel a bit lighter as I left the office – although by time I navigated the traffic, construction and mishaps on the road that ‘lightness’ seemed to have disappeared… !!  So much for construction season….

So, yeah, construction season….what about construction of our psyche… its re-construction actually, roads are torn apart and rebuilt – usually not starting from scratch…

And I’m not starting from scratch either – I have a foundation, seems flimsy at the moment, but nevertheless it’s there. And so….

Re - constructing the tattered soul…………..
Re - weaving the fabric of my life…..… (any of you know how to weave?)
Re - working that lump of clay that is me into something recognizable  - any potters out there?
Re-threading the needle – how many of us have done that?
Re-making, as in altering a garment to make it fit……any one?
Re-vamping….. fixing a shoe…?
Re-constructing a tattered psyche… and I do hope – as in ‘God’s got this’ kinda hope, not wishful thinking…that this tattered soul will be whole again.

And as I do more of this stream of consciousness thing, I am reminded of a Japanese tradition/art form called Kintsugi – ‘golden repair’.  A broken pot/bowl/whatever, is fixed with traces of gold. The result is a piece that is stronger than before – and more beautiful because of the repaired.  This is from mymodernmet.com:

Since its conception, Kintsugi has been heavily influenced by prevalent philosophical ideas. Namely, the practice is related to the Japanese philosophy of wabi-sabi, which calls for seeing beauty in the flawed or imperfect. The repair method was also born from the Japanese feeling of mottainai, which expresses regret when something is wasted, as well as mushin, the acceptance of change.

I’ve used this image for Bible studies about brokenness – and so maybe it’s time to listen to myself.
Beauty in the flawed – acceptance of change – we as a culture don’t do these things well –

but maybe it’s time to start…